How to Respond to Restraining Order Gossip: The Do’s and Don’ts

Posted by Joseph D. Lento | Sep 12, 2022 | 0 Comments

Having a restraining order taken out on you can feel incredibly overwhelming. You might even be worried about what other people will think about you. Below we have a list of dos and don'ts for addressing gossip surrounding the restraining order and how you can get ahead of it. A restraining order does not have to mean the end of your reputation.

Do: Talk to Your Family & Close Friends

When a restraining order is taken out on you, you may want to close up into a hole and never address it. But this is the worst thing you can do. At Lento Law Firm, we can assure you that being upfront and discussing the situation can make your life a lot easier. Tell your family and close friends what happened, you will need their support. Oftentimes, restraining orders come with other stipulations – like how far you have to stay away from the alleged victim – that can affect where you live, work, or play. Having your friends and family on your side during this process will make living your life just a little bit easier.

Don't: Try to Speak to the Alleged Victim

There have been instances in the past where a defendant will reach out to the alleged victim for help – asking for them to help recover their reputation. This is a really bad idea. Generally, restraining orders require you to refrain from speaking to the victim. By asking them for help setting the gossipers straight, you are violating the restraining order and subject to arrest. Instead, try not to think about them at all and address the gossiper's questions yourself.

Do: Discuss the Issue With Your Workplace

Some defendants think that keeping the restraining order from your workplace is a good idea. We've found it to be the opposite. Meeting with your human resources department or your supervisor and discussing the issue can actually make things easier in the long run. When you hide something like a restraining order, it makes you look guilty. Having the hard conversations will help your workplace understand your side of the story. Additionally, if the alleged victim works with you, it will help the office make accommodations for the two of you (i.e., moving you to another space to work).

How a Skilled Defense Attorney Can Help

If you are under a restraining order, a skilled defense attorney will be able to help you figure out how to overcome the negative aspects of a restraining order. Attorney Joseph D. Lento and the Lento Law Firm have years of experience helping individuals recover from the reputational harm a restraining order may cause. Call 888-535-3686 today or schedule a consultation online.

About the Author

Joseph D. Lento

"I pride myself on having heart and driving hard to get results!" Attorney Joseph D. Lento passionately fights for the futures of his clients in criminal courtrooms in New Jersey and nationwide. He does not settle for the easiest outcome, and instead prioritizes his clients' needs and well-being. With unparalleled experience occupying several roles in the criminal justice system outside of being an attorney, Joseph D. Lento can give you valuable behind-the-scenes insight as to what is happening during all phases of the legal process. Joseph D. Lento is licensed in New Jersey and New York, and is admitted pro hac vice as needed nationwide. In the courtroom and in life, attorney Joseph D. Lento stands up when the bell rings!


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When it comes to criminal defense cases, you need the right person in your corner. To learn more about how Mr. Lento can help you, call the Lento Law Firm today at 888-535-3686. or contact him online.

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